June's Musings

Like a rose Too far grown into shadow, soft petals shivering and growing hard in the cold So does the heart wilt in grief I loved you And perhaps I never said But losing you-- Somehow the air is  Dry and hollow and  Less satisfying to breathe Hope is found hidden Amongst ones and zeroes of old You find me, across planes, shake me, take hold of my heart and head and to whisper "I love you; it'll be ok."

For those of you who've been concerned I wanted to give a brief update on my health and well-being. Thankfully, lately I’ve been on the lower end of the pain spectrum. Unfortunately chronic illnesses can be offset by depression and anxiety, which can increase pain and the presence of inflammation. This, in turn, can increase the symptoms of depression and anxiety. This is definitely what happened to me. It can be a pretty morbid chicken-egg situation when dealing with mental health and chronic illnesses. Much of my trepidation comes from the inability to be independent and our capitalist society that not-so-subtly equates my worth and value as a human being with my ability to generate income. My insurance finally approved a biologic agent called Enbrel. Its purpose is to treat autoimmune diseases by interfering with tumor necrosis factor by acting as a TNF inhibitor. This coupled with physical and occupational therapy (as well as a ton of other drugs) should help return some norm